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Old Nov 21, 2009, 5:47pm   #11
DealtToHero
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What up. Quick question about bankroll. I played for a long time live but not much online and i want to start. I'm good not the best or anythign but pretty damn good. i think i can prolly do well online but wondering how most people startout. what site is best and how much should i put online?
I'm going to tell you something: you're not good. In fact, I'm 99% sure you're awful. Beating up on your drunken college roomates or against people in home games that don't know if a straight or flush is better doesn't qualify as "good".

I don't mean to offend, it's just that I see this all the time. Luckily, this site and others help you go from zero to hero if you work at it.

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Old Nov 23, 2009, 12:32am   #12
Snuggie
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Originally Posted by DealtToHero View Post
I'm going to tell you something: you're not good. In fact, I'm 99% sure you're awful. Beating up on your drunken college roomates or against people in home games that don't know if a straight or flush is better doesn't qualify as "good".

I don't mean to offend, it's just that I see this all the time. Luckily, this site and others help you go from zero to hero if you work at it.

DealtToHero.com
What up. I'm going to tell you something: you're not good at life. You are a douche nozzle (yes nozzle is worse than bag). None of the college roommates I ever beat in poker were drunk. Some of them might have been tripping ball sacks on shrooms or acid but they were never drunk. So please do not judge me.

I almost hate to tell you this but no one gives a shit if your dad invited you to come play in his big boys home game. No one gives a shit if you used to play warcraft, starcraft, had dungeons and dragons sleepovers or how often you masturbate to the magic the gathering black lotus poster on the wall above your bunk bed.

And while your proven three step system - involving 1. waiting for a hand, 2. making a hand and betting it, 3. getting all in preflop - that may have allowed you to beat your braindead homo-erotic group of friends at your regular circle jerk of a home game might be fascinating to some people but it still does not make you a non-douche nozzle.

Isn't there some poor kid you can scam out of his allowance by charging him $100 per hour to teach him how to be a PROFESSIONAL POKER PLAYER OMG!!!
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Old Nov 23, 2009, 2:36am   #13
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Now I know this might sound crazy, but I think you two may have made a few assumptions about the other.
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Old Nov 23, 2009, 2:47am   #14
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Gimmick fight itt?

Also lol @

"or how often you masturbate to the magic the gathering black lotus poster on the wall above your bunk bed."
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Old Nov 23, 2009, 5:42am   #15
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Let's try and keep it civil here, shall we?

Snuggie, a quick explanation of why exactly you think you're pretty good (a little more specific, what experience do you have, results etc.) would probably help everyone answer your questions. In fact, you can probably do well online. Most people can, if they put their minds to it, are willing to work on their game, have the right mindset. But winning at live poker does not necessarily translate well to winning at online poker, and certainly not at the same limits.
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youre thinking ship all the money to big daddy and are now thinking about how to receive that shipment
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Old Nov 23, 2009, 2:39pm   #16
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magic the gathering black lotus poster
you obviously know what this is, so, you fail.

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Isn't there some poor kid you can scam out of his allowance by charging him $100 per hour to teach him how to be a PROFESSIONAL POKER PLAYER OMG!!!
i'm assuming you went to his website? if so you fail again. or perhaps i fail because i didn't and his website is actually just pictures of him masturbating to whatever it was.

you're right about him being king of lametania, i just don't understand why you would want to try to dethrone him.

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Old Nov 23, 2009, 4:24pm   #17
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Old Jun 04, 2010, 12:58pm   #18
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As a new online player one should be aggressively bonus whoring and getting rakeback. On line poker rooms give one first time deposit bonuses (except for stars...not counting their, lol, $50 bonus as a bonus). Rake back is the most important thing to get and one needs to get it through an affiliate, even playing the $25 and $50 buy in levels one can generate $1,000-$4,000 in rake a month for the poker room...so getting back 25-30% of that money is a big deal and much more important than a deposit bonus-especially if you like the site. Once one signs up one is very unlikely to ever get rake back and one has often thrown away ones first time deposit bonus as well

If you're going to play at a site without rake back make sure they're giving you a great first time deposit bonus and one that quickly clears, also that one should look for affiliates giving sign up bonuses for signing up through them-the standard is a $50 gift card, though some affiliates will give one $50 free at certain sites and one can also get standard tracking software such as poker tracker, poker office and hold'em manager as sign up through us bonuses from affiliates.

One should consider their comp point stores too-a lot of them have nothing worth while in them and don't ship to America so check them out carefully. One can make money reselling the worthwhile items at Amazon or ebay.

One also need to consider how one is going to deposit at and withdraw from sites. If not an American neteller can be used to quickly transfer sums to new sites or withdraw back to your bank account. If an American there are no good methods of moving funds between sites or back to ones bank account and one will need to cash out ones winnings by snail mail checks.
Thanks for the tips. I never thought that you can get a rakeback by being an affiliate. What does a poker tracker exactly do? Just curious. I do know about reading your opponents hand history. Sorry for being a noob.
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Old Nov 10, 2010, 9:46pm   #19
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Wow.

The thread is like a year old, what's the reason to post here, as well as in a bunch of other dead discussions?
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Old Nov 12, 2010, 12:10am   #20
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If you're just starting then I suggest you canvas around and do some of those free trials on those sites. It is also important to get a good rakeback if your looking to sign up.
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