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Thoughts on PokerStars VIP Changes
2015-12-20

The Top 9 Myths About Online Poker
2015-05-17

The 4 Worst Tips Given To Beginner Poker Players (Don't Fall Into These Traps)
2015-05-03

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2015-04-05

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The Discomfort Zone: Manage it for Growth and Success
2015-03-15

An Intro to Daily Fantasy Soorts
2015-03-08

The 4 Main Psychological Principles That Shape Your Poker Play
2015-02-15

A Detailed Rake and Reward Comparison of Three of the Top Poker Sites
2015-02-08

Don't Jump The Gun: Get Full Value From Your Best Hands
2015-02-01

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With Apologies to Barney Frank

THE WEEKLY SHUFFLE, 2010-10-31, by Ozone

Two years ago, the poker world, along with the majority of other Americans, voted a bunch of Democrats into office with resounding enthusiasm. "Barack Obama is a poker player!" That's what I remember one recently-minted poker TV personality telling me in the spring of 2008 regarding why Obama would be getting his vote. "Barack Obama doesn't give a s*** about poker," was my response to him.

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In two days, the most poker-friendly political party in the U.S. will be voted out of office after two years of complete control over Washington. This is all but a certainty. At the time this article was written, Intrade political prediction markets are giving Republicans a 92% chance of assuming control over the House of Representatives. As for the Senate, Democrats are being given just a 55% chance of retaining power. Their reign is coming to a close, so now it's time to examine what they accomplished on behalf of online poker in their two years of power.

Wait for it...

Wait for it!!!!

Absolutely nothing.

Which means the editors of this site are entitled to a nice big fat we told you so. We would like to invoke the spirit of Denny Green and say with regards to Obama and his Democrats on their way out of Congress, "they are who we thought they were!"

After two years of total control over Washington, Democrats have left poker players with nothing other than an unprecedented deficit that will require tax hikes and compromises forced on future generations to pay off. You know what that means! Less money laying around for people to play cards with.

Now, to be fair, as the title of this article states, an apology is owed to Barney Frank. Frank, a Democrat, has worked hard for years now on behalf of online poker. He even got a pro-online poker bill past a House subcommittee earlier this year. This of course sent the poker world into a euphoric frenzy, but it's time for them to wake up and realize that the window has closed on that bill's chances of passing the House, let alone the Senate, and let alone signed into law by the President.

It is not Barney Frank's fault that his party was more concerned with throwing a bunch of litter on the streets of America just so they can hire people to clean up the litter while pointing and saying, "Look! Jobs!" It is not Barney Frank's fault that soon-to-no-longer-be-and-thank-god-for-that Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi was more concerned with lighting the money of future generations on fire via redundant "stimulus" spending than she was passing any real, useful legislation. It is not Barney Frank's fault that soon-to-no-longer-be-a-Senator Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid was more concerned with pushing through a complicated and perhaps wholly ineffective health care bill than he was legalizing online poker to the substantial betterment of his home state.

So we would like to extend a deep and heartfelt apology to Barney Frank along with a sincere thank you for his futile efforts over the past several years on behalf of online poker. Barney, we know it must be frustrating for you to be one of the only smart people in all of the federal government and endure two years of unbridled Democratic power during which you were unable to push through any of your very sensible pro-online poker bills. It must be frustrating for you to see your party seize complete control of the world's most powerful nation (for now) and do absolutely nothing beneficial to this country with this power for two years. We understand that it must take a toll on you to have to look organizations like the Poker Player's Alliance in the eye and say, "sorry that my party sucks so hard and was unable to get anything accomplished for you in our two years of total control over Washington."

We understand, Barney, and we forgive you. It's not your fault.

As for Nancy, Harry, and Barack?

Thanks for nothing.

The Weekly Shuffle is our Sunday column with our observations and commentary on the poker world. Have an idea for an article? Leave a suggestion on the feedback page.

 


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